Lazy Sunday? I wish...

I've been keeping out of her way this morning. First of all, I tried to get onto her bed to check out the sports pages and she pushed me off and said, Not now, Fat Lad. I have to strip the beds.

So, I went downstairs, and sat in the kitchen to stare at my food bowl. Then she came down, carrying an armful of sheets and stuff and dropped it all on my tail.

Then I went into the lounge and sat in my basket. She went into the cupboard and woke up that horrid Henry who lives there and pushed him around the carpet noisily saying That's right, Clever Paws, just keep sitting there and we will suck you up into the hoover bag.

I didn't fancy that much, so I sat on the stairs and she chased me with a dustpan saying, I wouldn't have to do this Marley if you didn't leave a trail of slime and fur everywhere you go.

Then she scooped up my blankie AND my basket and said Look - both of them are filthy and it's all from you. Do you remember your new year's resolution at all, Mankster?

Did it involve eating more cheese, I asked.